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Thank you for your interest in Caring For Young Minds. Unfortunately, our website is currently under development.
Please check back in the future to see what’s new with Caring for Young Minds.
(Presented at Childhood Depression Awareness Day October 20, 1999)
The problematic conceptual polarization of mind versus brain, which has plagued the mental health movement since its inception, has never been demonstrated more vividly than in children and adolescents mental health. The dichotomy is represented most starkly on the contemporary scene by intense and sometimes bitter disputes of a clinical, ideological and even political nature that are encountered in the field of child mental health.
Tonight, CYM (Caring for Young Minds) has invited all of us to participate in a worthwhile educational experience, with particular focus on the “child who cannot pay attention”. The goal is to reach a broad-based contemporary perspective from multiple sources, starting with the understanding of the child her/himself as a sophisticated being. The breadth of the spectrum includes emotions, behaviour, cognition and physiology.
To complicate matters, any attempt to understand the child out of the family context and his unique experience, is doomed to fail. A developmental bio-psycho-social approach to clinical assessment of children and adolescents is what families should expect from our mental health system.
The past decade has seen numerous efforts to integrate the diverse approaches to child psychiatry, for example by the publication of the DSMIV. This volume has helped mental health clinicians to share one reference and common classification. Meanwhile and adversely, it provided clinicians and consumers alike a ‘check list’ and concrete limitations that could lead to or deny certain diagnosis. Applying such a strictly phenomenological and descriptive ‘check list’ on our children, in a sense, does not address the child/adolescent as a person. If we use our collective experience and resources as parents and professionals, we should be able to listen to and understand the child. Nothing is more comforting to a youth than an understanding ‘other’.
Since familial aggregation of NBDs could indicate either genetic or environmental influence or both, the need for a ‘comprehensive assessment and treatment plan’ is the only path to ensure optimal care for our children. NBDs in children have long been under diagnosed and misdiagnosed because of the belief that a child’s immaturity and the developing personality would not allow the development or experience of many of the NBDs. That is far from the truth. Although the exact prevalence of NBDs in children and adolescents is unknown, several studies concluded that in the general population, 15 – 20% of children suffer from an NBD .
The real challenge for families and clinicians is to identify these children in our community and/or at home. It is a difficult task because children do not begin to use language as a vehicle for communicating information appropriately until around age seven.
Even while approaching the new millennium, verbal communication still is the best tool in diagnosing NBDs in children. No wonder many NBDs in children were not officially recognized in North America until the mid-80′s, at least 20 years after the Europeans identified and dealt with these disorders.
Since Neurobiological disorders often manifest in different ways at different points in development, child mental health clinicians should use the check list and standardized testing as ‘complementary tools’, not to replace listening to the child him/herself. Many of the children we fail to listen to end up somehow coping with a heavy load of vulnerability. Many enter their adulthood burdened by the initial disorder and a profound sense of loneliness.
Years later, adult psychiatry services are badly needed by the same population as adults.
We should not forget that ‘Childhood is a Short Season’.
Maged Kodsi, M.D.
Child and Family Psychiatrist
I think the most difficult aspect of my child’s problem is the stigma attached to it. After all, how could my child be depressed? Most people believe that abused and traumatized children get depressed. What does that say about my child? How could I tell anyone about his illness? They wouldn’t understand and they have no idea what it’s like living with a child who has this disorder.
My experience is, that society at large blames the parents if children have emotional problems.
How could a child from a loving home be depressed? It never entered my mind that this could be the problem.
To add to the grief was the delay we experienced in getting treatment. We had to wait months to see a child psychiatrist while we watched our child get worse. He was essentially paralyzed in school, he couldn’t do anything, his teachers were frustrated. We tried to help him but nothing worked. By the time we arrived at our appointment we were worn out, my 9 year old son’s self esteem was decimated, he was threatening suicide and we were angry and resentful at a system that was so unresponsive to a very needy child. From the time we first saw our paediatrician regarding our concerns, to the day our son started his medication, six months had passed. Denial of immediate treatment after referral was child abuse as far as I was concerned. Our child and the entire family suffered longer than necessary.
Learning that his problem had a biological basis relieved any guilt that I had, but the grief you experience after the diagnosis is like experiencing a death. Not knowing how this will affect the rest of your child’s life and the possible implications are devastating. Worse than a physical disability because it’s invisible. He might have this all his life. He wasn’t normal. I couldn’t fix it.
Once his medication was sorted out, we had a ‘new’ child. Transitions were easier. He smiled more, didn’t cry as much or get angry so often and when he did, it didn’t last for long. I could finally say ‘no’ to him and not have to suffer through a tantrum that went on for hours. We were no longer walking on egg shells.
Finally, everything wasn’t my fault.
If you would like to share your story with others please send it to [email protected] We will post stories that we think will offer support to others.
My son suffers from depression and anxiety. He has had a difficult time since he was 5 years old. When he was little he was a very social child; he was always trying to play with other children but was unsure how to relate to them. He had few friends and as parents we have always had to work hard to encourage other children to play with him. He has been a victim of extreme bullying; in grade 8, the bullying was so bad that every day he left for school and came home from school in tears. One of the most difficult challenges that he faces is his younger brother. His younger brother is a social butterfly, he has many friends, and our telephone rings off the hook for him. The tension between the boys is extremely intense; we can never relax when the two boys are home together. The fights are constant and I never know what to expect or when a flare up will occur. I used to be a fairly relaxed person but for several years, I have lived in a constant state of anxiety. I feel at times as if I need to escape from my children. Home to me should be a refuge but often it feels like a battlefield. Don’t get me wrong our eldest son is a delight! Most adults like him, and one on one he is usually a joy to be around.
Lately we have observed some changes. We have sent our son to private school where all of the staff understand what it means to be an anxious child. They helped our son to realize that he is a smart person and that he has many wonderful gifts and talents. Consequently, he has become a straight A student. He is on a medication that helps to control his anxiety and depression. He sees a psychiatrist on a regular basis. Our family sees a family therapist to help work through the sibling jealousy that we live with and to teach us to be more effective parents. Our boys are starting to like each other and their relationship is less adversarial. Our home is becoming a much calmer and happier place to be. It has not always been easy but he is worth all of the hard work. With the help of many gifted professionals, he is truly beginning to live up to his true potential. My son is starting to smile and laugh on a regular basis, and for the first time in his life when the phone rings, it’s for him!
If you would like to share your story with others please send it to [email protected] We will post stories that we think will offer support to others.
I am 13 years old and I have a brother 2 years younger than me. My brother and I get along okay sometimes, when things are going good for him, but when they are not, look out!
I don’t understand why he gets so upset at the least little thing and acts the way he does. He is on medication for depression and I guess it has helped over the past 2 years, but I don’t like what he has done to our family.
I used to step in to defend him at school when others would tease him, but then he turned on me so I just stay clear of him. I’m afraid to have my friends over for very long in case he gets upset. When he’s upset he says and does things that are embarrassing for me.
Sometimes at school, when he would get so upset and start crying or yelling, other kids would come up to me and say, ‘What’s wrong with your brother?’ I hate when this happens; I don’t know what to say. I wish he would act ‘normal’.
If you would like to share your story with others please send it to [email protected] We will post stories that we think will offer support to others.
We knew our son had some serious emotional problems and we didn’t know how to deal with it, so we went to the family doctor for help. He referred us to the Child and Adolescent Clinic.
Here was a talented and bright 8-year-old who had a lot going for him but he was never proud or pleased with his achievements and he was very unhappy. We just wanted him to be happy and enjoy being a child.
When the Child Psychiatrist diagnosed him with depression, I was surprised, even though his symptoms fit. I never associated ‘depression’ with children, only with adults. What do children have to be depressed about? Children are supposed to be carefree and enjoying their childhood. We never realized how much he worried about things and took everything so seriously. Little things said in a joking way would be taken literally to heart.
We had to learn different ways to treat him. We had to use a more gentle approach and choose our words carefully. The doctor explained to us that it was like he was walking around with an open wound and he was very vulnerable. When he did something that he should be pleased with or proud of, he wasn’t because his self-esteem was so low.
We went through guilt feelings of what did we do wrong. How could we have an older son who was well adjusted and a younger one who seemed so messed up? This seemed so new and strange to us.
Our son has been on medication for depression for the past two years. Life isn’t perfect in our family by any means, but then again, whose family is?
There are major improvements though. Our son is laughing again and making new friends. He is taking pride in his accomplishments even though he is still very hard on himself and wants to do better. As a family, our communication has improved and we are more open to each other about our feelings and those of others.
If you would like to share your story with others please send it to [email protected] We will post stories that we think will offer support to others.